This so brings me back to the Pokemon card dilemma when my now almost 15 year old son was 5. We decided to give in... our neighbor was a pilot so we asked him to pick up a collection while in the States thinking we could at least save some money. What we didn't think of was that the ones he brought back were in English and we lived in Norway...
It's always something! With two boys, the designer clothes issue translates into which football/soccer jersey to wear today;-)
Really liked the article! It brought me back to when I was young with many siblings, 10, and we couldn't have the "nice" clothes, cause we could not afford them. It made me sad for Sara. Looking back on my childhood now, what I remember most, is all the friends I had who liked me for me and all the carefree afternoons I spent with them. Having 7 sisters,I believe it is easier for boys then for girls though.
Thanks for the post. I grew up in a similar fashion. I instill the same with my children but the luring knowledge of what it feels like to be the outsider lingers. And, I wonder what is the best approach to maintain these important lessons while building self-esteem? My children are young and peer pressure is only beginning to pose challenges. But, I want to be as prepared as possible when it becomes a driving force and also begin to lay a strong foundation from birth through the present.
I believe we have to try to maintain balance and try not to go either extreme. I remember when I was a child the most coveted item for girls here in the states was the Cabbage Patch doll which cost over $100 and they kept releasing newer versions of the dolls. Now I think it's the American Doll collection that's a hit with girls. It just never ends. One thing that I remember is going to visit my relatives in Greece and seeing other kids with far fewer toys than I had. They were content with their limited collection of toys and mostly spent time role playing, being outdoors and doing activities that allow for interpersonal connections, team work and physical activity. My most joyful memories involved playing with kids outside and using our imaginations. Unfortunately, in this era kids seem to be learning that electronic gadgets and other material items are what you need to be happy. It's the wrong message to send. However, it's also nice to get a "treat" once in a while. I mean some of these new toys can be fun and sometimes even provide learning opportunities. Well, I can keep going on but this article was definitely very thought provoking for me!
I'm Robin, and I don't mean to post anonymously, but this website hates me :)
That said, I just experienced a similar situation with my 8 year old. All of a sudden *everyone* had these rubber-band bracelets called Silly Bands and the look of desperate outsiderness on my daughter's face for a couple of weeks led me to splurge on a package of those stupid shaped rubber bands.
But something interesting happened the day before we were going shopping. Two different friends each gifted my daughter with a bracelet. So I was able to lean on her (pretty hard!) that if I were going to buy them, she had to promise to "pay it forward"; that is she had to gift some of them to kids who didn't {yet} have their own collection.
And she did. They share, they swap, they pass them around. And I'm liking how it all looks from here. Over the past few weeks, the kids have all 'rescued' the ones without, and my daughter reports that the only kids who don't sport these bracelets are the kids that don't want them. There's enough for all.
I read "The Fur Berry Dilemma" with interest, and got worried when it looked like an appeal to "just buy it, she's only six". Now I see that the writer not only realized the value of sticking to her values NOW, before the stakes re higher in middle school. She also saw that bringing parents together is essential in working against hypermaterialistic culture. I have a slightly more scholarly version of the same thought, Mothers Against Consumerism: Getting Together and Swimming Upstream, coming out in ReSearch soon (Fall, I think). You can find it on the web at Brandeis.edu and just "search the site" for ReSearch. (Use that Capital S or you'll get all kinds of random things). Brandeis is Brandeis University in Massachusetts, USA. I'm a Visiting Scholar at the Women's Studies Research Center there. Georgia, Waltham, MA, USA
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7 comments:
This so brings me back to the Pokemon card dilemma when my now almost 15 year old son was 5. We decided to give in... our neighbor was a pilot so we asked him to pick up a collection while in the States thinking we could at least save some money. What we didn't think of was that the ones he brought back were in English and we lived in Norway...
It's always something! With two boys, the designer clothes issue translates into which football/soccer jersey to wear today;-)
Carmen in Zurich, Switzerland
Really liked the article! It brought me back to when I was young with many siblings, 10, and we couldn't have the "nice" clothes, cause we could not afford them. It made me sad for Sara. Looking back on my childhood now, what I remember most, is all the friends I had who liked me for me and all the carefree afternoons I spent with them. Having 7 sisters,I believe it is easier for boys then for girls though.
Thanks for the post. I grew up in a similar fashion. I instill the same with my children but the luring knowledge of what it feels like to be the outsider lingers. And, I wonder what is the best approach to maintain these important lessons while building self-esteem? My children are young and peer pressure is only beginning to pose challenges. But, I want to be as prepared as possible when it becomes a driving force and also begin to lay a strong foundation from birth through the present.
I believe we have to try to maintain balance and try not to go either extreme. I remember when I was a child the most coveted item for girls here in the states was the Cabbage Patch doll which cost over $100 and they kept releasing newer versions of the dolls. Now I think it's the American Doll collection that's a hit with girls. It just never ends. One thing that I remember is going to visit my relatives in Greece and seeing other kids with far fewer toys than I had. They were content with their limited collection of toys and mostly spent time role playing, being outdoors and doing activities that allow for interpersonal connections, team work and physical activity. My most joyful memories involved playing with kids outside and using our imaginations. Unfortunately, in this era kids seem to be learning that electronic gadgets and other material items are what you need to be happy. It's the wrong message to send. However, it's also nice to get a "treat" once in a while. I mean some of these new toys can be fun and sometimes even provide learning opportunities. Well, I can keep going on but this article was definitely very thought provoking for me!
I'm Robin, and I don't mean to post anonymously, but this website hates me :)
That said, I just experienced a similar situation with my 8 year old. All of a sudden *everyone* had these rubber-band bracelets called Silly Bands and the look of desperate outsiderness on my daughter's face for a couple of weeks led me to splurge on a package of those stupid shaped rubber bands.
But something interesting happened the day before we were going shopping. Two different friends each gifted my daughter with a bracelet. So I was able to lean on her (pretty hard!) that if I were going to buy them, she had to promise to "pay it forward"; that is she had to gift some of them to kids who didn't {yet} have their own collection.
And she did. They share, they swap, they pass them around. And I'm liking how it all looks from here. Over the past few weeks, the kids have all 'rescued' the ones without, and my daughter reports that the only kids who don't sport these bracelets are the kids that don't want them. There's enough for all.
I read "The Fur Berry Dilemma" with interest, and got worried when it looked like an appeal to "just buy it, she's only six". Now I see that the writer not only realized the value of sticking to her values NOW, before the stakes re higher in middle school. She also saw that bringing parents together is essential in working against hypermaterialistic culture.
I have a slightly more scholarly version of the same thought, Mothers Against Consumerism: Getting Together and Swimming Upstream, coming out in ReSearch soon (Fall, I think). You can find it on the web at Brandeis.edu and just "search the site" for ReSearch. (Use that Capital S or you'll get all kinds of random things).
Brandeis is Brandeis University in Massachusetts, USA. I'm a Visiting Scholar at the Women's Studies Research Center there.
Georgia, Waltham, MA, USA
This was a great article, with thoughtful musings on an important topic. Thanks!
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